While divorce is a highly emotional experience, did you know that you can have a civilized divorce? Here are tips given by divorce lawyers on how to make it possible:
Avoid the court
What comes to the minds of most people when they are thinking about divorce? Long court processes. Did you know that this should be the last thing you should think about when you are divorcing?
The civilized way of solving issues is to go the mediation way. Here you should hire a mediator who will listen to your case and help you in coming up with a solution. The mediator can be a divorce lawyer or any other professional.
The mediator will help you in reaching an agreement on how much you will be contributing towards child support (if you have children) and if there is a low earning partner, the professional will guide in reaching an amount that is comfortable for the both of you.
In addition to this process being quick, it also saves you a lot of money as you don’t have to commute to and from the courthouse every now and then. You also reduce the emotions that come with divorce as you don’t treat your partner as an enemy. In addition to this, you don’t air your dirty linens in public.
You should always strive to have a mediator in your case. It’s only after the mediation talks have failed that you should head to court and let the judge make his/her decision.
Don’t hide property
As mentioned, divorce is highly emotional and most people tend to treat their ex-partners as enemies. Due to this, they try to hide some of their property so that they don’t share with them.
They hide the property by transferring them to their friends and distant family members. This is wrong.
You should note that when you hide the property and the court gets wind of it, you will be in big trouble. When the court knows that you were hiding the property, there is nothing you will say that the court will take as the truth.
What is the end result of this? you won’t get a favorable hearing in court.
Regardless of the spite, you have for your partner, you should keep your property intact and don’t try to hide or liquidate it. This will give you an honest look in court thus increasing your chances of getting a favorable hearing.
Don’t involve the children
This goes without saying that you should keep the children out of the divorce process. Not involving the children means:
- Not taking your frustrations out on the children
- Not blaming them
- Not venting to the children about the problem you are facing
- Not asking the children where they would like to live once the divorce is complete
- Not pressuring the children to make decisions
- Not trash talking your ex-partner to the children
- Not discouraging the children from spending time with the other parent
- Not withholding the children from your ex-partner
- Not arguing or fighting in front of the children
While you should keep the children out of the divorce process, it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t let them know at a certain point. You should let them know at the end of the divorce process or once the divorce is complete.
You should note that you should always strive to give the best to your children; therefore, even when you divorce, you should provide them with anything they want. Don’t punish them just because you are no longer in good terms with your ex.
Work with the right lawyer
It’s always wise to arm yourself with a lawyer when you are undergoing divorce. While this is the case, you should note that you shouldn’t work with just any lawyer that you come across. You should take your time to find an attorney who will be of value to you.
Go through the list of the best divorce lawyers in your area and invite them for an interview. As rule of thumb, ensure that the lawyers are highly experienced. They also should be certified to work in your local area.
While cheap attorneys might seem attractive, you should stay away from them. This is because they are most likely inexperienced thus will give you subpar services.
